Desktop Linux is Still an Adventure#

As I have often repeated, 99% of my Linux exerience is on servers. Of that 99%, like 75% is on Debian. I have long been embarrassed by how little I know about Linux Desktop Environments, compositors, or themes. My idea of configuring Linux is editing files like /etc/hosts or /etc/network/interfaces. Setting a static IP on an Ethernet adapter while maintaining access to WiFi is like negotiating a visitation schedule for a Golden Retriever caught in the middle of a lesbian divorce.

I upgraded my home network not long after moving to a house, and with all of my gear in boxes, I struggled to find a laptop that was the trifecta of operational, equipped with Ethernet, and VLAN capable. I had laptops with Ethernet and Windows, which is not VLAN capable, and I had Linux laptops that, while being capable of VLANs, had no built-in Ethernet. I discovered that it was important to test each switch port that I had configured for tagged and untagged traffic, as well as firewall rules.

In a fit of rage, I purchased a Raspberry Pi 400 which was capable of VLANS and had built-in Ethernet. It’s an awesome, affordable workstation. It just requires an external monitor. The ideal network crash workstation would have built in Ethernet, a serial port, and a built-in monitor. Essentially an old laptop.

The right tool, running the wrong OS#

The network crash laptop, a.k.a. the crashtop, is a tool. I don’t need office suites, media players, or anything really excpet a browser, a text editor, and a bunch of CLI networking tools. My experience with consumer network equipment is that it puts management interfaces untagged on VLAN1. I also put the servers on their own VLAN isolated from network management. This means that the crashtop needs to physically plug into ports, and have static IP’s on both the network and management VLANs.

I have a small stack of very old Dell Latitude E5500’s. These are ancient laptops with ancient Core2 Duo processors. They have 15-inch screens, 4 full-size USB 2 ports, an SD card reader, and a db9 serial port. It’s the kind of machine that comes in incredibly handy like once a year for doing some old-fashioned computing thing. One of these is my radio programming workstation, which I attempted to use for the crashtop, but Windows is not up to the task. Also, Windows 10 running on a 20-year-old laptop means you can’t run a lot of software, like the Raspberry Pi Imager. So even when I dumped the radio workstation in favor of a Pi, I had trouble imaging the SD card.

After the networking ordeal, I decided to use one of the E5500’s as a dedicated crashtop. It should fold away nicely out of the way until I need it.

Advanced networking on a Desktop Distro#

My goto distro for no-fuss, light weight, and easy to use is Ubuntu Mate. My favorite feature is Mate Tweak, which changes the window management behavior. When I was unfamiliar with Mate, I used the Redmond profile, which makes the whole thing approximate Windows. Now that I am a bit more comfortable, I am experimenting with the Cupertino profile and the WhiteSur theme. I tell myself I am training for MacOS. A long time ago I used Lubuntu to create a workstation for my daughter from an obsolete home theater PC, so I figured it would be a good fit for this dinosaur of a laptop.

Like iOS, Ubuntu works prefectly for the 6 tasks that was designed for: social media, streaming media, online shopping, messaging, and in the case of the iPhone, calling. Document editing, web surfing, watching videos, all of that stuff works with zero effort beyond installing the app you want to use. Advanced network configuration like multiple static IPs and VLANs involves fighting the “helper” apps like NetworkManager and netplan and forcing them into submission. I was able to do it, but I had to read a lot of forum posts and make a lot of mistakes. I went through a similar ordeal getting multiple monitors to work on my thin client workstations that I converted to Ubuntu workstations. There are expected configurations that the tooling biases toward, like WiFi first, or dual monitors in a horizontal configuration. Going against the prescribed config is a knockdown drag-out fight.

I wish I had documented the process, because it was hairy. It took so long that when I finally got it working, I had the “much rejoicing” reaction from Monty Python and The Holy Grail.

In hindsight, I probably should have installed plain Debian, got the static IPs and the VLAN’s configured, then installed the desktop and the browser on top of it.

UPDATE 10-10-26#

I went with my own advice and I reinstalled plain Debian 13, configured my VLANs and static IP’s, and then installed LXQT and Brave. It’s not really a laptop anymore, in the sense of a portable PC, it really only works when plugged into the network switch, and only connects to a single wireless network. It’s more of a folding desktop PC.